I’ll be honest with you, readers: I was dreading looking for a Rough Start vehicle of any kind. It’s been a minute since I really went dredging for a cheap-car candidate, and for good reasons:
1. I’ve got my car and I don’t need to go out hunting anymore (my wife has a cast-iron skillet with my name on it if I drag any more hopeless wrecks home).
2. What shouldn’t be a shock to anyone, is that the original premise of the Rough Start series ($5,000, ready to drive or with one hell of an excuse why not) has been trashed. Blame economic factors, blame sellers who only see dollar signs.
3. …what’s left to buy even if you found something?
A daunting task, but I figured “what the hell” and went for it. This time, my restrictions were simple: $1000-$8000 price range, older than 1996. That’s it. And even that didn’t seem like a big enough net to cast up until I saw this thing. No, I haven’t lost my senses. In fact, this tiny little wind-up toy makes me smile.
Because the only thing that Kia sold in the United States at the time were bicycles (I know, my first bike was a Kia), you know this car better as a Ford Festiva and not as a Kia Pride. Whatever…it was a three-door hatchback meant to play the role of subcompact and fuel economy champion in Ford’s lineup. The last role I saw it play was in the movie Idiocracy as the car Joe has to drive during his “rehabilitation”. (Don’t ask about the hood ornament.)
But I have a reason to dig this. Back in my youth I took the Festiva’s predecessor, an early-1980s Fiesta, and made the same pickup-truck conversion. Only I didn’t install a dump bed. That would’ve been handy. No matter…the Fiesta made for a tiny little truck that sipped fuel and moved more weight than Ford Europe ever would’ve believed. This Festiva has the same things going for it: Road legality ( ahem ), frugal powertrain, and tiny size helps. It’s cheaper than a UTV, too. Need a pit car for your drag team? Need to haul things across your farm? The answer to both is “Festiva”.
Who would’ve ever believed that sentence?